Category Archives: Leadership Axioms

Leadership Thoughts

“Leadership is stewardship. It’s temporary and you’re accountable.”

This quote by Andy Stanley, pastor of North Point Community Church, kicks off one of my favorite podcasts. I have it memorized by heart and I think I do a pretty good Andy Stanley impersonation as I mimic his cadence and inflections each week as I listen to the introduction.

More than just a great quote or motivational saying, Andy is right.

Those of us in leadership – whether it is in the church, in the workplace, or at home – have been given our position by God and he expects us to steward each moment to bring Him glory and honor.

Leadership is temporary. Solomon declares that there is a time for everything under the sun including the time we have been given to serve and lead. One day we will transition to a different role, the kids will leave the nest, and for some, retirement may come sooner than we would like. Like Steve Miller says, “Time keeps on slipping into the future.”

We are accountable to God for our leadership, too. One day, if we steward these gifts well we will hear Him say, “Well done good and faithful servant” or we will be confronted with a reality that because we were afraid, failed to plan well, or just were just plain lazy we left some things undone or missed opportunities God had in store for us.

I think that those of us who find ourselves in leadership positions inherently understand these truths but sometimes we struggle with how to connect our orthodoxy (right understanding) with real, tangible orthopraxis (right practices).

More than anything, I want to help you steward your leadership well by challenging you to honor God in everything you do in every area of your life. The Hebrew word for Honor is kabed and it has a weightiness to it. It can be translated as honor, renown, and glory. When the Psalmist says in Psalm 86:9,12, “I will praise you, Lord my God, with all my heart; I will glorify your name forever” he is honoring God with everything that he is.

I love how Colossians 3:23–25 reads in The Message. Paul says, “Work from the heart for your real Master, for God, confident that you’ll get paid in full when you come into your inheritance. Keep in mind always that the ultimate Master you’re serving is Christ. The sullen servant who does shoddy work will be held responsible. Being Christian doesn’t cover up bad work.”

A person of honor always gives their best effort in every area of their life. Are you stewarding the life God has given you to glorify Him in every aspect inside and out?

I also want to help you lead well during the time God has given you to lead. The day in and say out grind of leadership will test your faithfulness. There is always another person to visit, always another phone call make or email to send, another task to complete, and another project to begin. The problem for most of is not that we have to make choices between right and wrong or choose between good and bad. Tensions arise because we become paralyzed when we have to choose between right and almost right. We procrastinate because we have to choose between good and great. Leadership take discernment and wisdom. To me, wisdom isn’t knowledge. Wisdom is applied knowledge. We are faithful to our calling when we apply the knowledge we have obtained to make the most out of every opportunity presented before us.

Ephesians 5:15–17 (NLT) challenges us saying, “So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise. Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days. Don’t act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do.”

A faithful leader is wise in how they use their time to accomplish the tasks God has given them to serve His people. Are you being faithful with the time and opportunities before you?

Finally, if we are to be accountable we must humbly submit our lives to God. The higher we climb in our leadership and the more things we accomplish the greater the temptation becomes to take full credit for everything good that happens in our lives. Of course the opposite is true. Sometimes things do not work out how we planned. The vision that we had for our lives and the people we serve can go off the rails. When this happens we can be quick to take all the blame. Some call this the Superman theory where leaders begin to believe that they are Superman and must take on every task, burden, pain, joy, celebration, and failure. A wise teacher once told me, “Don’t be quick to carry all the blame when something do not go the way you planned because that same attitude might cause you to be quick to take all the glory when something goes well.” That’s sound advice.

I’ll let you in on a secret that you already know… You are not Superman. Neither am I. We have no way of controlling every outcome of the decisions and choices we make in our leadership. However, we serve the One who knows all, is in all, and works all things – good and not so good – to His glory and the good of those who love Him.

Proverbs 3:5–8 ESV) says, “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD, and turn away from evil. It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones.”

An accountable leader humbly submits to God and trusts Him with every aspect of their leadership. Are you trusting in the Lord with all your heart or are you leaning on your own understanding?

See Something, Do Something

“That’s not my job.”

If there were an award for The Most Frustrating Sayings That Cause Me To Bang My Head Against The Wall this one would make it past the swimsuit competition and into the Top 5.

This phrase makes my skin crawl. It is one thing to here it from a kid who doesn’t want to clean up the mess caused by another kid but it is a whole different level when it is coming from an adult leader.

The problem is… I thought it earlier today. 

I was in the Men’s Room at our building and I reached for the soap dispenser and it was empty… just like it has been for the last 2 weeks.

“Why is there still no soap in this dispenser?!?” I thought. “Someone needs to replace the empty cartridge. Someone besides me. That’s not my job.”

One of the maxims I try to live my life by is See Something, Do Something. It means that if you see something that needs to be taken care of… Take care of it. No fuss. No blame. Just do it.

Trash on the ground? Pick it up.
Batteries dead? Replace them.
Gate left open? Close it.
No toilet paper? Get a new roll.

These aren’t tasks that you have to ask permission to take care of. They aren’t jobs that require you to blow a whistle and announce what you’re doing either. Sometimes things slip through the cracks and the person responsible overlooks it or is unaware of the problem.

Sure, if it becomes a chronic problem or a habitual nuisance it needs to be address with the one accountable. However, more often than not it is a one-off mistake or simple oversight.

When you See Something, Do Something you are living out some fundamental virtues needed in the world today such as INITIATIVE, TEAM WORK, and SELFLESS SERVICE. When you ignore something that has been left undone and get upset about it you simply are being LAZY and SELF-CENTERED.

Next time you come across something that needs to be taken care of, don’t ignore it. Don’t make a phone call or write a memo. Don’t get huffy and flustered.

Go to the storage room, pick up the new soap cartridge, and cheerfully, gladly, and with a song in your heart replace the empty one.

Now, excuse me while I head off to the storage room.

Catalyst Dallas Highlights

I had a full weekend.

I had the opportunity to attend both The Catalyst Conference in Dallas with some of my team and than a Men’s Conference with some great dudes from our church. I am exhausted, inspired, spent, fired up, sleepy, and wide-awake. Many of you in ministry and leadership know exactly the kind of tension I am feeling right now. These events are often like trying drink from a firehose. With so much information and inspiration coming at you you grab what you can, take some notes, sing loud and proud, and then find some time over the next few days to ruminate on and incorporate what you’ve learned into your real world.

The theme of Catalyst this year was A Community of Change Makers. I attend the Atlanta event back in October and was excited to take a handful of our ministry leaders to the event at Gateway Church here in the metroplex. The major emphasis from every speaker was that to truly lead others effectively, a leader must lead him or herself first.

Here is a fundamental truth that is so important for us to learn and live out:

Who we are as leaders is more important that what we do.

For today, I just want to share a few of my favorite quotes from the weekend – with a couple of Don Miller & Bob Goff quotes from the Men’s Conference. I hope that these thoughts give you some motivation for your week ahead. Be sure to comment on the exit question at the bottom.

Whatever you have to do today, Love. Everybody. Always.

Andy Stanley

  • 2 questions every leader must ask: 1) Who am I? 2) What breaks my heart?
  • Great leaders make things better for their people.
  • You have no idea what hangs in the balance of your decision to embrace the burden God has put in your heart.
  • Many years from now, what would you like people to line up to thank you for?

Lisa TerKeurst

  • External Change requires Internal Shifts.
  • The 1st Five – give the first five minutes of your day to the Lord.
  • God is good and God is good at being God.

Dr Caroline Leaf

  • Your brain is nothing compared to your mind.
  • Change you mind and you can change your brain.
  • You can listen to God or Google and Gossip. (Non-toxic thoughts vs. Toxic Thoughts)

Eugene Cho

  • God doesn’t want to change the world. He wants to change us.
  • Act upon the thing that God puts on your hearts.
  • Don’t be more in love with the IDEA of change. Actually Change.
  • Don’t quit. Persevere. (Note: Apparently Cho had been ill and traveled from Seattle to Dallas. He had to stop part way through to take a breath and recover.)

Robert Morris

  • We may be born selfish but we are re-born generous.
  • Do not GIVE in order to GET. Wrong motivation.
  • Mammon promises us things only God can give. Life. Peace. Joy.
  • People don’t need money. They need God.
  • Abel gave of his first fruits. Cain gave what he wanted, when he wanted, in the way he wanted.
  • We are the most like God when we GIVE.

Robert Madu

  • When you encounter Jesus you always walk away with more than you expected.
  • Fatherhood is the best ‘hood.
  • There is a vast difference between knowing Church and knowing Jesus.
  • Jesus wasn’t just a good man but a God-Man.
  • When someone is lowered through the roof… you should probably shut that sermon down.
  • When your EXPERIENCE doesn’t line up with your EXPECTATIONS God is probably giving you a REVELATION. Pay attention to what he is telling you.

Danielle Strickland (The Highlight of Catalyst for me)

  • Everyone wants to change the world. Not everyone is willing to get up (early) to do it.
  • You know which surfer catches the wave? The one in the water.
  • Posture yourself/Posture your life in such a way that when the wave comes, you can catch it.

Rich Wilkenson Jr

  • God hasn’t called us to hard things. God has called us to do IMPOSSIBLE things.
  • Don’t let your past failures or your fear of future failures keep you from following where Jesus is calling you.
  • Don’t take a fragment of failure with you to the next place.
  • Criticism can get on you but don’t let it get IN YOU.

Bob Goff

  • You are not defined by your worst day or your greatest success. You are defined by LOVE.
  • When we live under the banner of Christ it doesn’t just change some things, it changes EVERYTHING.
  • I’m just trying to be the next humblest version of myself.
  • Love. Everybody. Always.
  • People turn into who others say they are.
  • You get the green lights you get.
  • God wants us to live right on the edge of YIKES.
  • It’s not about MANNING UP. It’s about SHOWING UP!

Don Miller

  • Tie your dreams with the dreams of others. Good stories involve other people.
  • Think of Joker’s face and Vader’s limbs. They didn’t do the hard work needed to bring about real healing.
  • We are in the middle of Act II. It’s difficult. There is no resolution. In the midst of conflict.
  • Look at the people God calls into LEADERSHIP. You have not done worse than them.
  • Heroes are in it for the sake of others.

Exit Question:

What is the most important leadership lesson you are currently try to live out in your leadership context?

7 Questions to Ask Leaders

At Catalyst Dallas, John Maxwell spent his Thursday session pouring into us some of the lessons he has learned about leadership. He wasted no time in sharing with us and he started by quickly giving a list of important questions to ask other leaders when you meet with them.

John famously tells the story that when he was starting out in life he wrote to people he viewed as great leaders and people that he could learn a great deal from. He offered them lunch and $100 dollars to meet with him. The ones that accepted, he and his wife used that city as the destination for their vacation so he could meet with them. Over time he developed a set of questions that helped him get the conversation going and to maximize his learning.

Here are the 7 Questions to Ask Leaders
1) What’s the greatest lesson you’ve ever learned?
2) What are you learning now?
3) How has failure shaped your life?
4) Who do you know that I should know?
5) What book should I read?
6) What have you done that I need to do?
7) How can I add value to you?

I feel that you learn the most when you ask the right questions.

I am grateful that Dr. Maxwell shared these questions with us. I hope that they will be a blessing to you as well.

Axiom 2: Family First

It has been a pretty crazy week around the Felker household. Our son came down with the stomach bug late last week. My wife got it in the wee small hours on Sunday. I thought I could escape the plague but I was infected and early Monday morning I was down for the count. The only thing I could do on Monday was lay still and hug my pillow. I absolutely hate being sick.

Thankfully, this bug was only a 24hr things and so we are all on the mend. However, this family fight against the stomach virus really threw me off my schedule. I lost a whole day at work and had things pretty booked on Tuesday so I was unable to post my second installment in the Leadership Axioms series. So, with that said, let’s talk about this week’s Leadership Axiom.

I want to live and die by this week’s axiom. I have tried to make this belief a core part of who I am and I have said this statement for so long that have forgotten where and when I first heard it. I didn’t coin this phrase but I wouldn’t care if it were inscribed on my tombstone. For me, as a minister, this should be no pithy, quaint saying. This is life and death stuff we are talking about here.

Are you ready? Here it is…

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I refuse to sacrifice my family on the alter of ministry.

No question. This is one of the most important things I can do to succeed and to guarantee that I leave a legacy of faith and not a hollow, charred out crater of a life with collateral damage strewn from here to kingdom come.

Too much? I don’t think so.

I’ve heard too many stories. Seen too much hurt.

Nothing- and I mean NOTHING- is more important to me than my wife and my son. If I don’t get MY FAMILY right, I really don’t believe I can get anything right.

I’m not perfect. If I don’t stay on top of my schedule it can quickly squeeze out any and every good intention that I have. Here are a few things I try to do to make sure that I am putting my family first.

  • Calendar- As best as I can, I do not make definitive plans with a meeting (in the evening) or weekend event without first consulting Sandy and synching our calendars. We share an iTunes account so we can see each others calendar changes and appointments on our iPhones. This isn’t fool proof but it is a great way to defer to one another. For weekend things, Sandy gets first dibs at me. In fact, there is something coming up in the next few weekends that I’ll have to skip out a little early on because we are going to the pumpkin patch. No way I am missing that!
  • Schedule-Free Night(s)- Last year, we had at least two week nights where I did not have a regularly scheduled event in the evenings. We essentially had Monday and Thursday nights to ourselves. This meant that we could spend quality and quantity time with each other on a consistent basis. If I needed to go to a game or meet with someone or do something that I needed to do for ministry there was some margin. Things are a bit different this season. We still have our Monday nights but I am teaching Financial Peace on Thursdays until December. The decision to teach was made jointly by Sandy and I with the understanding that we would have to be extra intentional about protecting our family time on Mondays. Our Saturdays have opened up quite a bit this season so there have been plenty of opportunities to catch up on together time (too cute?).
  • Communication- As you can see in the last to sections, Sandy and I try to constantly communicate with one another. Communicating dates and times are important but what we strive to do is communicate expectations. The goal is honesty with one another. “I need more time here.” “Can you help me with this?” “I really need this to happen?” “Is it ok if we…” Marriage and Ministry cannot coexist without clear communication and a willingness to be open about expectations and needs. My default is to keep working.
  • Team Work- This may not work as well with everyone but… When it comes to ministry, we are a team. We go together and we work well together (painting a room together is another story though!). We worked together at a school right out of college, we worked together in youth ministry, and now we are trying to see what working together in this new role looks like. I love that in my ministry, my wife can take part and that she has the freedom to have her own ministry. We really strive to be a team in the best sense of the word. In running, they say that a way to improve and to reach new levels of success is to have a partner to pace with. We are that partner for one another.
  • Improvement- I do not want to come across as though I have learned the secret to protecting my family and my schedule. I am way too young to have it all figured out. Everything is a work in progress. My ideal would be that once a week we could sit down over coffee with pen and calendars in hand and map out the perfect week. I would love to do that!!! That’s the goal I want to work towards but we are a long way off. I am missing those Thursday night right now- but we both feel that offering FPU is something we can and should make time for. At the end of this season we will readjust and see what is needed. In fact, these conversations have already begun.

The only secrets I have learned are that I must embrace the truth that MY FAMILY COMES FIRST and that we must be FANATICAL about finding ways to make that truth a reality.

I ask that you pray for us that we will continue to choose to make our family a priority and I challenge you to embrace the best way to ensure that you leave a legacy of faith for everyone that you minister to. There is life in this statement. There is ultimately freedom in this statement. Don’t be another burnout. Don’t let you family be another statistic.

Say it loud. Say it proud.

“I refuse to sacrifice my family on the alter of ministry!”

Change Equation

Yesterday I teased a new weekly feature here for the blog where I plan on writing about some of my favorite Leadership Axioms that have impacted me personally and professionally over the years. I define a Leadership Axiom as a short, concise phrase that conveys a leadership truth or principle. These axioms also need to be memorable and applicable to everyone. The first Leadership Axiom comes from Pastor Mark Batterson from National Community Church in Waschington, DC.

Pastor Mark believes that from time to time a leader and/or the leadership team should get away from the hustle and bustle of day-to-day ministry for a time of reevaluation. In fact, if it is possible step away from the office, get out, and get away. Or as he says it:

Change of Pace + Change of Place = Change of Perspective


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What a great equation! I love it because I have benefitted from it time and time again. Without fail when I unplug from my normal surroundings and schedule I see a huge benefit all the way around. Getting outside of the normal routine does wonders for my creativity, my focus, and my productivity.

Examples of how I put this axiom to work:

  • Going to the coffeehouse. As you can see from the picture above, I never go to the coffeehouse alone. Sometimes, I just have to get away from my email, Twitter, and phone calls to spend sometime reading or taking notes. I strap on my headphones and start up my study playlist and get to work. 30 minutes in a coffeehouse equals at least 1 hour of uninterrupted focus.
  • Attending conferences. Attending conferences offer both a change of pace and a change of place. Next Wednesday, we are piling into Edna, the church van, and hitting up the Catalyst Conference in sunny Atlanta, GA- or the ATL as I like to call it. This will be my 9th Catalyst ATL appearance and my first as a lead minister. The normal routine will be thrown out the window in order to make room for a couple of days of being challenged and pushed with new ideas and fresh thoughts. Love, love, love it!
  • Longer lunches. Much like my coffeehouse trips, I never go to lunch empty handed. I always take a book or my Moleskine with me to capture new thoughts and notes. Sometimes I just need to sit with my thoughts and big ole soda to get unstuck or experience a creative break through.
  • Bookstore Crawl. Remember Borders Bookstores? (Too soon?) I get some of my best ideas while “wandering” up and down the aisles of my local bookstore. The pictures on the covers, the titles, philosophies, display stands, you name it feed my creative juices and help me clarify my thoughts.
  • Retreats Nothing helps you change your perspective like getting away from it all on an extended retreat. I am actually working on scheduling some time away before the end of the year. In fact, in the next 3-6 months, it is my hope that I can take a personal retreat, a ministry staff retreat, and a church leadership team retreat. These don’t need to be a week long excursions into the woods where you forage for berries armed with only a flashlight and your Bible. You just need to get away for a set period of time (usually 24-48hrs), unplug your phone, and spend an extended period of time focused on listening to God. That’s it.

Change of Pace + Change of Place = Change of Perspective

I’d encourage you to incorporate this great Leadership Axiom into your routine and it is my hope that you will benefit from this truth as much as I have.

Next week’s axiom will be about Vision. You won’t want to miss this one.

Truth Bombs

Leadership Axioms are short, concise phrases that convey a leadership truth or principle. Over the years I have collected quite a few of these little sayings and tried to incorporate these concepts into my leadership philosophy and practice. Often times I wish that I had come up with some of these myself. After talking with a friend about some of these Leadership Axioms, I’ve decided to write about a few of the ones that I have benefited from the most. It is my hope that these leadership concepts will help you as you lead yourself and the people God has entrusted into your care.

There are 2 great things about Leadership Axioms:

First, they are short and memorable. In his book, Axiom: Powerful Leadership Proverbs, Bill Hybels compares these short statements on leadership to many of the proverbs found within scripture in that they can serve up “a truckload of weighty wisdom in bite-size chunks.” If something is going to make it’s way into my busy schedule it has to be short, sweet, and deliver maximum life-change goodness. Leadership Axioms fit that bill.

Secondly, these truths are transferable. You don’t have to lead 1000 people or work in a mega-church to learn from and incorporate these truths into your leadership. They work because they are true not because you have a huge budget or a giant platform. That’s the great thing about values and principles- everyone can afford them.

To kick off this series, I’ve chosen one of my favorite Leadership Axioms from Pastor Mark Batterson. I’ll be posting these on Tuesdays from now on so please check back tomorrow for the Greatest Leadership Equation Ever. (Math and Leadership rarely overlap so this axiom is extra special.)

What are some of your favorite Leadership sayings or truths? Join the conversation on Facebook or Twitter.