Pastor, when was the last time you you prioritized your own S.E.L.F. care?
I don’t mean, when was the last time you booked a massage and a facial treatment? I’m not asking when was the last time you mentally and emotionally had to checkout because you were so tired and stretched thin?
When I talk about S.E.L.F. care, I want you to think back to when was the last time you prioritized your SPIRITUAL HEALTH, your EMOTIONAL MATURITY, your closest LIFE CONNECTIONS, and your immediate FAMILY RELATIONSHIPS.
As I pastor, I know how busy and how overwhelming it can be leading a church. The demands on your time and the immense responsibilities facing you make it difficult to slow down and look inward. Plus, you might think – how can I focus on myself when I have to take care of everyone else?
S.E.L.F. care is NOT selfish. S.E.L.F. care is a way to function in life so that you can operate at greater capacity in ministry. You must attend to your SPIRITUAL and EMOTIONAL NEEDS so that you can be fully present for your LIFE and FAMILY.
In Mark 12:30-31, Jesus calls us to “Love the Lord … with all (our) heart and with all (our) soul and with all (our) mind and with all (our) strength.” He then goes on to say that we also must love those around us as we love ourselves.
When I entered ministry and church work, I thought everyday I would be engaging in practices and with people that would ensure that I increased and grew in these ways everyday. What I found out is that the opposite was more often the case.
Because ministry never stops, I neglected my PHYSICAL HEALTH. Too many pizzas and late nights in youth ministry. Lots of sitting and lunch meetings sharing carb-heavy meals. I gained weight and failed to take care of the body God gave me to carry out the work He called me into.
I let the stress of life and ministry impact me EMOTIONALLY and MENTALLY. In my 20s and 30s life comes at you pretty fast. Growing a family, greater responsibilities at home and in ministry. Transitioning roles, making decisions, balancing EVERY voice AROUND you, discerning the voice INSIDE you. If you cannot learn to function well in these areas, you will pay a heavy price.
One saving grace for me is that God has blessed me with an incredible RELATIONAL SUPPORT SYSTEM. I have a handful of deep and abiding friendships – guys outside of my church environment who have NO exceptions on me other than to be a friend and to receive their friendship. My immediate family has been the single greatest blessing. I have a wife and kids who embody what it means to love whole-heartedly with UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.
Here is what I believe and how I want to help YOU.
I believe that ministry and church leadership ought to STRENGTHEN YOUR SOUL – not slowly suffocate it. I don’t want the work you do FOR God IN a church to destroy the work OF God IN you.
My work as a pastoral coach helps ministry leaders, like you, gain HOPE, CLARITY, and STRENGTH in every area of your life so that you can thrive personally and professionally. Through 1:1 coaching, I help pastors identify goals and work through issues to help them see and work towards a brighter future. I help leadership teams work better together – clarify their values, harness their strengths, create systems and process to share ministry across the whole church. I believe that the best way for me to serve the church of Jesus Christ is to serve pastors and church leaders.
So, as I sign off today, let me ask you a question…
- Renewing your SPIRITUAL HEALTH
- Moving toward EMOTIONAL MATURITY
- Strengthening your LIFE CONNECTIONS
- Focusing on your FAMILY RELATIONSHIPS
If you could spend your time and energy on just one of these areas over the coming days and weeks, which would have the greatest impact on your life and ministry?
Leave a comment below and let me know which area would benefit you the most and why. If you leave a comment, I will send you a list of resources that can help you get started.