Become a rapper.

Ten years ago, if you wanted to break into the music business you would have done well to put on a pair of boots, grabbed your acoustic guitar, and strutted your stuff at the Blue Bird Cafe down in Nashville. Country music was hot, thanks to Garth Brooks, and it was relatively easy to become a star in honky-tonk. After the country music phase the country moved into a teeny-bop world. For every Britney there was a Mandy Moore and for every Backstreet Boy there was a 98degrees. Thanks to Lou Perlman and men of his ilk, manufactured music became a staple on America’s airwaves. If you were 13 and had a set of pipes there was money to be made. The teen scene became an easy market to cash in on.

Now in 2005, I would argue that the easiest market to break into is the Hip/Hop/Rap/R&B hybrid currently riding the crest of cultural popularity. I call this a musical hybrid because even 5 years ago R&B was a different genre than Rap. I don’t remember Toni Braxton (R&B) spittin’ rhymes or Will Smith and Jazzy-Jeff (Hip-Hop) gunning each other down. Today, for every talented rapper like Common, Kanye West or Jay-Z there are dozens of Ray Js, Playaz Circles, Twiztids, and Mike Jones’ (Who is Mike Jones?). I’m still not convinced that rap’s darling boy, 50cent, isn’t some corporate creation. For some guy who has sold crack and who has been riddled with bullets he sure raps about tropical islands and sex a lot. Some hardcore life?!?! G-G-G-Unit!

Anyway, go by your local Target or peruse through iTunes or, heck, watch TRL. There are a slew of untalented rap artists out there that are making money hand over fist. With the recent Sony payola scandal, I wouldn’t be surprised to find out just how manufactured these new “artists” really are.

You too can be the next B Rabbit. Just furrow your brow, look tough, and sell out.